Blurg. Today was about lists, and I've decided that this summer it would be nice to not make so many damned lists. I live my life by lists, usually, but I'm a bit tired of them. "Little tyrannies," N might call them. I have to keep the big list, you know? Because otherwise I would fret about missing deadlines and the like. But the little, daily list-making is tiresome, tiring, tired. Retired.
For today, anyway.
I had the most overwhelming urge to take a vacation, solo, today. This, just days after gushing over how much I love my children. And of course I still do. But there are days when the hours between the time I get them both dropped off in the morning and have to pick them both up just whiz by, the fastest time in the universe, a bullet-train of time.
This probably is because of the lists. I'm too busy finishing things on the lists during those hours and then the hours are gone and I had no time to rest or read or just blah out. The list is usually finished right as I'm picking the girls up and then I'm jealous of my time and we all know how it is when you can't be fully present but wish you were somewhere else.
Tomorrow, there will be no list. Maybe Wednesday. But not tomorrow.
On a completely unrelated note, you can go check this post out over at Huffington, if you're so inclined.