Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Dear Nature

Dear Nature,

You are HILARIOUS! Where did you think that up? You crazy fox, what with all your "spring snowstorms" and stuff. Every year you crank up the dial to 60, and I get out all my flip-flops and t-shirts, and then you dump an ass-load of snow on us for about twelve hours and I have to get my wool pants and fuzzy boots out again. Then you make it 60 right away again and flood everything! So brilliant! You're such a kidder.

Also, could you tell you friend Culture that he, too, is hilarious? I love how he decides that all the elementary schools will be closed thanks to your ridiculously big-ass snowstorm, but forgets to send the snow-day memo to the companies and the universities. He's totally laughing his ass off watching everybody use up their precious few vacation days or spare cash on extra babysitting. Oh, I'll make it so the kids have to stay home but won't give the parents a way to care for them because they have to WORK. Hee-haw! Guffaw! Hilarious!

Anyway. Love you.

Your pal,

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