This is what happens when you go out of town for the third time in two weeks, "for work."

It is for work.  I'm still kidding about that, tastelessly.  Also, I appreciate the sacrifices my husband makes so that we can live a swank lifestyle, like going to "Albuquerque" to tweak a laser when you just freaking got home from "Berkeley."

All I'm saying is that if you leave me alone with these children for that long, some shit is going to get bejeweled.

I mean, honestly, if you're going to graduate from kindergarten and 2nd grade all in the same day, and if you are going to overcome your total fear of any sort of pain whatsoever to get your ears pierced, you deserve to get bedazzled at Claire's.

Scoff if you must, but did you know it costs SIXTY BUCKS to get two little girls' ears pierced?  You were thinking Claire's wasn't that classy of a joint, but this proves that it obviously IS.  And those were for the cheap earrings.  You can pay $60 PER KID if you want to buy your kid diamond earrings.

Uh, no.  I don't.  Thank you, Claire's.

For the record, Addie is bedazzled with rainbow flowers and Nolie chose the pink peace signs.  I would have predicted the opposite, which goes to show a mama just never knows.

This also proves that both girls are clearly destined for debauchery, madness, looseness, and I don't know what else.

Good thing E. gets home tomorrow!  God knows what the hell else I'd have started poking holes in.